How well do you know the girl? Is that one of your criteria for babysitting, how well you know her?
You don’t know the teacher until a couple months in, when you first meet him/her at a parent-teacher conference.
Yet you just stated you have intrinsic distrust of the babysitter unless you know her. Which, incidentally, most abusers of children are not strangers…. but people the family ‘knows’. Uncle Jim. Pastor Greg. Babysitter Cheryl. Aunt Betty. Grandpa.
The kid who shot up the Uvalde school? He didn’t start with the school; he started with Grandma’s face.
Trusting someone because you believe you ‘know’ them is foolish.
Meanwhile, there’s tiny Miss Jenkins teaching your third grader… and carrying a firearm. Teaching is stressful. How do we know she doesn’t snap, and shoot down the first three rows of kids?
The PO for Thursday...
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GuideToACrazyWorld
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Re: The PO for Thursday...
Yes it is. As I said I don't leave my child with people I don't know.
I know them on a service level, sure. But you don't really get to know a teacher any more then you really get to know a celerity. Both have carefully curated public personas. This isn't a criticism it's just the nature of high viability positions.
The difference here is that school is a vital step in a child's development. I'd call it vital. Yes, we could home school, but I've seen that far to often stunt social growth. So, comparing the damage of homeschooling to the fairly rare abuse in public school, we've chosen to relies on the state of California's vetting of teachers. It's not ideal, and I'd prefer to know the teachers much better, but it's what is best for my son.
My wife can't work because of her MS. If she has a dr. appointment, I take time off work. If we are in a real bind I have several people who I know and trust who are happy to take him. I can't think of any situation in which the risk of not leaving my kid with a babysitter is greater then the risk of leaving him with one.
This is because people that the family know have more access to the child. To translate this to fear of one's own family is a nonsensical use of statistics. Just because a child is more likely to be abused by their grandfather then a stranger doesn't mean my child is more likely to be abused by his grandfather and then a stranger. There are people I know well who I'd never leave me kid alone with, and one in particular that we greatly limit her alone time.
It's also important to point out we are just talking about abuse. We are talking about values that are instilled in the child, accidents and just the general welfare. Why anyone would trust a 14 year old they have never met with such things is beyond me.
You have essentially just said all trust is foolish. Did you really mean that? The alternative to trusting someone you know is trusting someone you don't know. Which is a lot more foolish. You have to trust someone at some point. Otherwise it is a very lonely life. I'd far prefer trusting my evaluation of someone I have good familiarity with, then trusting someone I know nothing about.
That can be true whether or not it is legal for her to be carrying. Someone who would shoot three kids isn't interested in the law all that much. Guns are illegal in schools today, we still have school shootings. Simply making something illegal doesn't make it go away, it pushes it to the black market. Sometimes that is necessary, but it doesn't eliminate the problem, it just changes it significantly.